I have noticed that there are people who do not really enjoy what they are doing in life. In fact, they seem to be struggling and some even hate what they are doing. However, they feel they have to carry on due to various reasons such as the need for income and family commitments. They cannot see a way out and continue to be trapped in a life of misery.

Certainly, it is important to do what we truly believe in, so that our passion for what we do will lead us to complete tasks and achieve our dream to live the life we want to. Indeed, given the choice, most of us would opt to do what we like and enjoy, but sometimes we may not have such luxury. There may be pressing reasons why we cannot do what we want to do. This is when we need to ask ourselves some really hard questions. Should it be a case of ‘short term pain, long term gain,’ or ‘short term gain, long term pain’? Obviously, most things come at a price, but we have to perfectly frank with ourselves and ask ourselves these tough questions before we can see a clear way out such a situation.

Be who you are and live life your way!

That fact is that if you ask ten people their opinion on the same thing, you will get ten different answers. Whose opinion will you go by then? Why even bother to ask others when they do not know you inside out the way you know yourself – how can they be credible advisers to you when they do not know you as well as you know yourself and when they do not have your best interests at heart? Who will bear the consequences of their advice? You! You should be aware that people sometimes give an opinion off the cuff without really thinking about the outcome of what they are suggesting.

This is your life. How you design it will make all the difference!

Be confident!

Self-confidence is as much an art it is a science. The bottom line is how you look at yourself and carry yourself in life. When we look at ourselves in a positive light, we feel good about ourselves. We know that we are a good force in this world. We are sure that we are pleasant beings and the world welcomes us. This internal positive way we talk, stand and behave. Confident and positive people rarely frown. They are more likely to be the ones making jokes, making others laugh and creating a positive presence among their peers.

Building up a person’s confidence is not easy. Fundamentally, it is about a change in mindset. If the mind is not ready to change for the better, no matter how hard we change on the outside, we will remain the same in our mind. If we really want to be confident, we need to put a stop to living our life through the eyes of anyone else. Once we decide to live life our way, the process of building confidence can begin.

Failure is not scary, face it!

If we try to avoid failure at all cost, we will be so paralyzed by the thought of failing that we will do nothing, and therefore we will not advance in life. This negative mindset is not unique to adults only because some adults impose this detrimental way of thinking on their children too. They are so fearful that their children may encounter from it. Unfortunately, this only turns their children into conservative, timid persons who do not dare venture out of their comfort zone. How will they achieve anything great or small in life if they do not dare go beyond their comfort zone?

Life is not smooth sailing

Life is not smooth sailing. If we do not dare to take risks, we re not going to achieve anything great in life! We can never expect success all the way with no failures at all.

Extracted from It’s Your Life, You Call The Shots by Dr Tang Teck Nguong